My Conversion at Sea....

I have been so pissed at Google and their Picasa photo loader that I was wavering asking my host, famed trial lawyer, John Eddie Williams to file suit and upon winning we could take over the company. It works that easy I am sure. I have been unable to load photos and when I briefly could they had me on rations of a mere four at a time. As if I could only blog with four photos!! FYI: Picasa/Google has no help desk ....just more frustrating blogs you are suppose to decipher and figure out the answers from everyone elses trial and errors. I think we got it solved now. We are cooking with gas! Or, so I thought.....

Last night, I was so hot - our brand new Lenovo IBM laptop bearing the new Vistas program froze and then refused to boot repeatedly. I would power it down and then restart and all was good until we got to the Vista system. Then crash!! So much for my relaxing vacation....my blood pressure was through the roof! After struggling with it for an hour and watching the little hour glass go around and around on the screen it finally booted forty minutes later only to refreeze again. Anyone that knows me a smidgen knows I am an instant gratification kinda chick --- so while waiting for this to boot I got on the Lady Sheridan's computer (it still has the reliably good Windows XP system) --- in blond, frantic, black American Express in hand I ordered the newest latest and greatest MacBook Pro. By the way, Steve Jobs has a two day delivery. I had to wait almost four and a half months for my new IBM laptop.


As aforementioned in the last post, the yacht we are on happens to be anchored next to Paul Allen's 414 ft. Octopus. I asked one of the stewards for a few trash bags or an igloo cooler I could waterproof. Naturally, I got a puzzled look. In true Lucy Lipps fashion, I had every intention of just taking the Lady Sheridan's SeaDoo over to Paul Allen personally and demand he fix it. I figured since I bought enough Microsoft products over the years (which probably paid for 10 gallons of diesel on his 150,000 gallon tank). I told our Captain Keith and John that if I did not get an instant response I would just stage a lock down inside the Octopus' bright yellow submarine and refuse to leave until my demands were met....basically fixed this piece of crap computer. They both basically ignored me.

Eventually, I got a long blank stare and my brilliant husband added "you maybe there a while that sub can hold over a half a dozen people for over two weeks with its oxygen supply" (leave it to him to throw an engineering "wet blanket" on my master scheme)....I had a morbid thought: little ol' me could be on there months before Paul's peeps got around to dealing me!

Back to storming the Octopus .....I totally envisioned having "grandiose words" with Paul via "Operation SeaDoo" -- my plan was coming together until once again, "Mr Reality Check" I am married too pointed out all the Navy Seals of his security detail on each bow and deck for seven stories!

I came to the realization it was more cost effective for me to give MAC a whirl when weighing the cost of a prosthetic leg.

Lady Sheridan's, Captain Keith announced we were invited to go on the Octopus for New Year's since we were yachting neighbors. After pondering this invitation, I am confidant they sent this via fax NOT email since I am sure their Vista program locks up too. Realizing, I was a lot closer to being a guest of Mr. Allen's and a full blown "coo" was not really in order....I asked my darling husband the pertinent question "can I bring my f&%#cked up Vistas loaded laptop to Mr. Microsoft's yacht?"

I was informed it was inappropriate to wear shoes on his yacht (rule of most mega-yachts) and it was considered a faux pas to bring faulty equipment manufactured by your host.

I think Bill Gates and Paul Allen named their program Vista since they "enjoy the view" from their half billion dollar yachts while the PC world is "drinking the kool-aid" and the $$$ keep rolling in.

My new superhero is the manufacturer of Blackberry.....he is on my new short list of people to stalk. In fact, I need to make commercials for Blackberry - I roll over it, drop it, Sinclair throws it and it never lets me down. It's "man's best friend" for the die-hard tekkies!